You throw the coconut at a tree. Nothing. You throw the coconut at a nearby wild boar – in case you haven’t realised yet, you’re stranded on a desert island. You have wild boars, trees, coconuts and canned laughter to spare as you go slowly delusional – but still nothing.
You even try and throw a wild boar at the coconut, but the wild boar is quite heavy and ends up just tusking you in the face until you drop it, allowing it to run away while looking back at you with a justified mixture of confusion and disgust.
To be fair to the boar, it was a ridiculous idea to start with. What were you thinking? What you should’ve done is got out that iPhone of yours and Googled “How to Husk a Coconut”. You would’ve been greeted with one of the best videos on the internet.